FOOD IS AWESOME

This is most definitely why I'm fat. That and I'm unemployed, captivated by my computer, and just generally a puddle of nothingness. But! I do love me some cooking. There's nothing quite like having no money to go out to make one become a chef.

That's why I present to you my first recipe!!! It's simple, cheap, and you've probably had it before, but it's also complex in taste, and you've probably only had it in expensive Italian restaurants. It's...

SHITAKE MUSHROOM RISOTTO

This dish requires a lot of "babysitting", so I'd recommend getting all your ingredients out and chopping them up ahead of time.

You'll need, for 1 (very hungry) person...

1/2 cup risotto (arborio rice)
2 cups chicken or vegetable broth
1/4-1/2 cup shitake (or any kind, really) mushrooms, sliced
1/4 cup white wine
2 tbsp. olive oil
1/4-1/2 cup yellow onion, diced
2 cloves of garlic, finely chopped
1/2 cup parmesean cheese, grated
some thyme, doesn't matter what form (though fresh or dried is better than ground)
some black pepper

Cooking risotto is different from your previous rice experiences. I like it, because, well, I've fucked up a lot of rice in my day, and this process allows you to know exactly what is up with your rice at all times. It's like Jersey Shore, or other quality television shows. First, put the broth and white wine on the stove, and get it hot or boiling. Then, in a separate (and medium-to-large) saucepan, get the olive oil hot, then put your onions and garlic in. Cook them until the onions are translucent and smell all nice-like. Next, put the risotto into the same pot. Weird, right?! Coat the rice in the olive oil. Now add about 1/4 cup of broth. Constantly stir (this is the theme, by the way). Wait until the broth has been absorbed by the rice to add another 1/4 cup. Constantly stir.. Add the mushrooms at some early point (takes about 10 minutes to cook em real good). Constantly stir. It will take about 15-20 minutes, constantly stirring, to absorb all of the broth. Upon the final addition of broth, add the parmesean cheese, thyme, and pepper. At this point, if you are not constantly stirring, the rice is now burning on the bottom. This is why you should have been stirring.

The result is friggin' awesome. I've also made it without the wine, and it was almost as delicious (and still delicious). The parmesean cheese dominates the flavor, so use sparingly, if you don't like it. But let's just face it, who doesn't like parmesean? Isn't that the one cheese we can all agree on? Aren't there reasons we should love Italians, in spite of Jersey Shore and The Sopranos?

Of course, there's a picture. I just haven't taken it yet.

But I do want to post a picture right now, because I'm OCD like that. So here is a picture I cannot stop staring at even though I hate cake, unless it's from Pix or has cheese in it. It's Owen's birthday cake!!!


Yay!!!